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Monday, 7 November 2011

Ray on Monday - What a Night

Place…sitting in bed.
I’m so tired Lord I need to talk with you before I get out of bed.
It’s been a rough night and I’ve got important business to do today. The very thought of it makes me cringe, not because of the work, but because of how I feel. A rubber ball is sharper than me at the moment.
Why is it that nearly every time I’ve some important business to do, especially when it relates to your Kingdom’s purposes, things get difficult the night before? It can’t be simply nerves! Take last night for instance. That thunderstorm was a cracker. It rattled the roof and walls with its thunderclaps and the rain, wow. When my eyes open enough to look out the window I reckon it will look like a lake. I probably could have slept through it after a while but the children were frightened, restless and having nightmares. Terrible combination for a parent’s sleeping programme.
So, here I am. How I wish I could stay in bed, call in sick and give the day a miss. Can’t be done, so I’m really desperate for your mercy! Times such as these push me towards one of three corners in my mind. To be honest, the most natural one is marked, ‘frustration and anger’. I can visualise it. Plenty of kick marks and sore toes but no value. The other corner, so tempting in which to hide, is signed, ‘self-pity and resignation’. Been there too often and didn’t do any good. The other alternative is, I know the best, but it is so demanding on the will. It’s signed, ‘Trust!’
Perhaps this is the corner from which Paul declared to the Corinthians, “ My, (meaning Your) grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” I sure would appreciate the same realisation. How I wish you would simply zap me with your grace power and let me get on with things. I know. You don’t work that way. So, out of bed, feet on the ground, get moving body. As I go, so your grace flows, that’s your way and this evening I’ll realise it. Just at the moment however it’s taking all the obedience my faith can muster to start.
Ooohhh no!
What’s happened now? Another problem!
The power’s gone off. Lord, if it stays off, or recurs in the meeting, what’ll I do? My wonderful (well in my thinking) power point presentation will be ruined.
What’s that? Zechariah 4:6. Let me look it up. “’Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the Lord Almighty.’”
I apologise Lord. I was thinking it was all up to me. Thanks for your promise.
Ray (Sustained by Grace) Hawkins


  1. I can relate Ray. So often it was a Saturday night, when I was due to lead the worship the following morning, when the children had bad nights with sickness or bad dreams. So many times my bleary-eyed prayer in the morning was "Lord it has to be You, because I have nothing left. Your strength, not mine." Thanks for sharing. :)

  2. Thank the dear Lord for His promise that His strength is made perfect in our weakness!
    We are scheduled to leave for Bangkok on Sat. but Somchai, our interpreter, hasn't given us the OK yet. He's worried about the flood waters backing up in the toilets, and the tap water and possibly electricity cut off.
    That makes it hard to sleep at night, but we're packing our bags in faith!

  3. Isn't it reassuring to know our sovereign Lord expresses His grace to us in our weaknesses. Our Saviour goes before us and smooths the way or makes our weary efforts productive in the hearts and minds of those under our responsibility. Thanks Amanda and Rita for your input. Look forward to hearing how the Lord over-rules, especially regarding Bangkok.
    Relax in your weariness and have confidence in the way the Lord weaves His will in and through all things.